The Joys of Womanhood

I’ve always been glad I was born a girl, so I could become a woman, a wife and a mother. Even as a child, I believe I was aware of how special it was to be a girl. I’ve always felt that women were created with special gifts of spirituality, different than those of men, closer ties of communication with Heavenly Father, guardian angels and the Holy Ghost. I’ve always felt a little sorry for men . . . that they missed out on these particular special tender gifts, perhaps that is why Heavenly Father made it possible for men to hold the Priesthood, to make them equal to mothers.

Through out my life I have always been aware of the power and influence and responsibility that go with being a girl. Much has been written about the influence of an honorable woman, wife and mother. I have often felt this power or the lack of it, when I was young and even more so as I’ve gotten older. Life is easier if we have models to follow and I was fortunate to have goodly parents and to be raised in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints with specific role models to follow. I loved studying the life of Mary, the mother of Jesus Christ and Lucy Mack Smith, the Prophet Joseph Smith’s mother. I dearly loved my own mother and wanted to be just like her and tried hard to follow her example. I think we should live our lives as if we might become the mother of the next prophet, president, or the greatest teacher, piano player or movie star . . . something that would put our whole life into print. How scary . . . but famous people have mothers too. What if we became one?

Sometimes we live with people that are the opposite of what we want to become. These people too are examples for our lives. I had a friend whose mother was a ‘shouter’. She always spoke in a voice of command and my friend had a difficult time getting along with her. But my friend was wise. She disliked those qualities in her mother so much that she decided she would never be like that and she learned not to yell at people, or to judge and to be very forgiving. Knowing the circumstances of her teen years, I was amazed that she became such a soft-spoken kind person, building good communication with her husband and children. I asked how she did it and she said she constantly reminded herself of the person she wanted to become, learning to change negative feelings to positive ones. She also married a very good man who helped her in her guest. How did she get so lucky to find such a man? She became that kind of person herself.

This is the trick that I have learned and I’m still working hard at it . . . to become the kind of person I want to marry, to treat others the way I want to be treated, to love my children as much as I want to be loved. These are simple rules, but full of power to change our environment and thus our lives.

I have always liked movies and have followed the lives of my favorite movie stars quite closely at times. I find it is all about choices. We don’t change others . . . we can only change ourselves. Others may change if they admire who we are, but it will be their choice. People don’t change just because we want them to. So many of the movie stars and other famous people marry the wrong spouses, get a divorce and then marry the same kind of person all over again. It’s not only movie stars of course; their lives are just made more public and easier to study.

This is a wonderful age to live in! There are so many choices available. Today women can make their own opportunities, they can get education in many fields, and information and help are everywhere. Because there are so many choices it is also more difficult to decide and easier to make mistakes. However, mistakes are methods of learning and forgiveness is a blessing. We need forgiveness for our own mistakes as well as learning to forgive others. Our mistakes teach us to make better choices, not making the same mistakes over again.

A blessing that I have found to be so important to my life, is to remember the tender communication, the special blessing of womanhood, the spiritual ties that bind us to our Heavenly Father and Mother. We are born with those special feelings; those ties are always there, unless we break them. They are held strong with obedience to the commandments Heavenly Father has given us that keep them strong. However, if we break those ties, communication lines are down, we are alone and we feel that despair. Repairing the broken ties is difficult and painful, but it can be done. It’s called repentance.

I’m remembering the special times in my life . . . my happy days of growing up in a family of love, the sometimes sorrowful times of growth, the thrill of being a wife, bringing a new baby home from the hospital, and the joy of talking, playing and being with our children. The only advise I feel qualified to give is, “Enjoy being a girl! Feel the power of doing the right thing at the right time. Live each day caring about other people, listening to others and learning how to please our Heavenly parents.” This has been a guide in my life. If I can just please my Heavenly Father and Mother, then I can feel good about myself. Self-confidence comes from the approval of our Heavenly Father. Enjoy being a girl! ~ Shirley Sealy